Corona Diaries

Mick “I don't feel I have someone who I can turn to for support at the moment as everyone has their own problems to deal with. I feel the weight of the household on my shoulders which I have to support.”

Background Information Male, aged 35-44, Civil Servant for Welsh Government, South Wales, White, Married, and Father to 4-year-old.

March 2020 Tuesday 10th March I travelled to/from Wrexham to deliver a presentation for work purposes. In the evening I attended the Script concert at Cardiff Motorpoint Arena. Earlier in the day I took tablets for a headache and general feeling rubbish. I went to the concert with my wife who said she took paracetamol earlier in the day as she felt under the weather. The Corona virus was mentioned by the lead singer a number of times and he acknowledged it could be their last performance for a while. The concert was sold out but there was a number of seats around us which were vacant. Perhaps people are already taking precautions by not attending large gatherings? Wednesday 11th March Lots of posters being erected in work about washing hands for 20 seconds, singing "Happy Birthday" twice. Will washing our hands really prevent a pandemic spreading here? I've also told my 5 year child about washing hands for 20 seconds and singing "Happy Birthday" twice. I don't think she understands the importance.

Saturday 14th March I attended the Jake Bugg gig at Cardiff. It was a sold out gig, the Hall was packed and no sign of safety measures. The Wales v Scotland 6 Nations game which was due to take place today was postponed due to the Corona virus. I'm surprised this gig went ahead - still no change in policy by UK Government/Welsh Government on banning large gatherings. I took hand sanitiser with me tonight as I do feel apprehensive about attending the gig tonight and very uncertain about my safety. Sunday 15th March I attended the Stereophonics gig at the Cardiff this evening. Throughout the day the band have faced negative criticism on social media about their refusal to postpone the gig - it is their last gig on the tour tonight. Their reasoning is because the respective governments have yet to bring in a ban of mass gatherings the gig will go ahead (perhaps their insurance would cover them if a ban was enforced?) I took hand sanitiser with me again tonight as I do fear for my safety. I spoke with a friend who works at the Arena to ask about a potential ban on mass gatherings. My friend said there would be announcement tomorrow by Boris Johnson - my thoughts were "why 24hrs? What he is

waiting for?" We didn't shake hands - just knocked elbows and joked about it. Lewis Capaldi also held a sold out concert in Aberdeen tonight, obviously he didn't feel the need to postpone either.

Monday 16th March Boris Johnson made an announcement at 5pm tonight asking people to self-isolate themselves for 7 days if they've got symptoms of Corona virus and family members must self-isolate too. People are encouraged to work from home where possible. There are reports in the media of people panic buying food/toilet rolls in supermarkets. Boris Johnson has asked people not too as there's enough to go round and food, if bought properly, won't run out (!)

My wife was unable to go to work today as she couldn't get out of bed and didn't have an appetite. No temperature, a slight cough but she is feeling rotten.

Tuesday 17th March Had a phone call at work from my wife who hasn't gone to work yesterday or today as she hasn't been feeling well since the Script gig. She asked me to go home as she felt really unwell and couldn't move out of bed. I got home and she was exhausted in bed, unable to move and hadn't ate anything. Told my daughter about the virus and the importance of washing hands for 20 seconds for singing Happy Birthday twice, or the chorus to Mr Brightside! I worked from home for the rest of the day.

Wednesday 18th March Took my daughter to school today as my wife is still bed bound. She hasn't managed to eat much and has lost her appetite. She hasn't got a continuous cough or fever though. I worked from home today. It was announced today all schools would close in Wales on Friday 20th March. This is getting serious and a bit scary. Thursday 19th March Took my daughter to school again today as my wife is still unwell in bed. No continuous cough or fever though. But she has lost her taste and is not hungry. She phoned the Dr but said she must ring 111, no option to see Doctor. I worked from home today. Feeling knackered after taking care of my daughter in the morning i.e. breakfast routine and taking her to school, picking her up from school, dinnertime routine and bed time routine and looking after my wife.

Friday 20th March Took my daughter to school again today as my wife is still unwell in bed. She did manage to eat a few pieces of toast though.

Last day in school for my daughter today. They've brought the Easter holiday forward by two weeks. No one knows when the schools will reopen. I doubt it'll be after Easter but I hope it will be after the Whitsun half-term at the end of May. I had a conversation with another dad in the pick-up queue where I gave my opinion. He owns a bakery and said there's a shortage of flour already and he can't fulfil his orders or run cookery classes. There are scenes of panic buying of toilet rolls, tinned goods, pasta, and flour on the news. The Chancellor has announced big fiscal stimulus and job retention scheme known as 'Furlough'.

Monday 23rd March

Participated in first PE With Joe Wicks. 30 minutes exercise, Monday - Friday. I want to get fitter and stronger for however long lockdown lasts. I did it with my daughter. Lockdown will last at least 3 weeks. 1 form of exercise is allowed for 30 minutes a day with only people from the same household. Everyone must work from home where possible and not go out except for emergencies and to go food shopping. This is happening too fast, all in one week. I can't go anywhere and don't really know how to function or what to do. Food delivery slots are a nightmare, we have a season ticket for home delivery but can't get a slot. Home schooling went ok. The routine is: 1 hour schooling in the morning by my wife, and then I do an hour and hour in the afternoon after lunch. I work from 6:45am - 1pm. Lunch between 1pm - 2pm. Home schooling 2pm - 3:30pm. The school is setting work for us to do with my daughter. I have had to borrow a printer, ink and paper from my parents in order to print out the homework. I don't know how the other parents are managing to cope with more than one child to home school.

Wednesday 25th March 9 months until Christmas Day - who could have foresaw this?! The news report that a 21 year old with no underlying health conditions has died of Covid-19. The line being peddled by the media that this is "just the flu and only over 50s can get it" is rubbish; it's a killer virus. Science can't protect us at the moment without a vaccine; we have to protect ourselves and reduce the spread of the disease to others to try and stamp it out. I'm starting to get worried about my parents and parents-in-law. My mother-in-law has a severe heart condition (i.e. she survived a heart attack 3 years ago) and my step father-in-law was diagnosed with incurable cancer before Christmas. They will have to shield for at least 12 months and not see us or my 4 year old daughter. We won't be able to celebrate Easter or her birthday with them.

Just watched News at 10 before going to bed. Patients in hospitals filmed themselves on the wards - very scary situation with patients on ventilators and struggling to breathe. Those who are dying are dying along with no families nearby. Two of the patients were my age - 36. A 5 year old has been diagnosed with it proving that all ages can get it. UK Government is to flatten the curve which means they are willing for people to die of it. No community testing is planned so how will people know if they have it or not or are asymptomatic i.e. carriers without knowing. Prince Charles has tested positive for Covid-19 after being photographed shaking hands with people. My mother has been in contact with a work colleague whose wife has it - I hope she doesn't develop any symptoms. Thursday 26th March A campaign has started for everyone to go out on their front door steps and clap for the NHS and key workers at 8pm on a Thursday. It is known as "Clap 4 Carers”. Tonight will be the first clap for carers. I lived in my house since 2012 and only know a few neighbours. But today we received a leaflet through the door advertising a new WhatsApp group for the street which I've joined. It seems a number of us will be out on our door steps tonight to clap. One thing which is developing is a community/togetherness spirit in the street which is a positive. There's even talk of a street people to celebrate when this is all over (whenever that might be!) I delivered a food parcel to my mother-in-law who is shielding. Although we are in lockdown people are able to deliver food parcels to shielders. The M4 was eerily quiet at 5pm usual rush hour time. I took part in the one minute clap for carers which went on much longer for a minute and I cried. I have no idea why I cried or where it came from, it was definitely an emotional release. Friday 27th March End of the first week of home schooling. We fell into a routine quite quickly which has helped us all come to terms with the quick lockdown and the shock which I'm still processing. I'm hoping writing this diary will help me make sense of everything which happened once lockdown is eased and we begin to return to normality again. Our routine consists of: Breakfast; PE with Joe at 9pm or Cosmic Joe; School work at 10am - 11:30am; Lunch; School work at 2pm - 3pm. I attended a retirement do at 3pm today which was held over Microsoft Teams i.e. virtually. My colleague worked for the organisation for 42 years and had their send-off via video link which was awkward. I don't they could have foreseen that happening. Working from home feels like doing A Levels revision or writing my dissertation for university. Work at 6:30am - 1:30 pm; lunch; work 5:45pm - 7pm. It's hard working upstairs in a box room whilst I hear my family having fun and laughing downstairs.

Saturday 28th March My first trip out of the house of the week and getting out of the car and being surrounded by the public. I went to supermarket which has now implemented a queuing system to control the numbers of customers entering the store and to maintain social distancing. The queuing system was a bit like Disney but without the fun! Whilst supermarket workers filled shelves they closed the ales off so to protect the workers - weird. Sunday 29th March I took a walk into my village centre today, it was very noticeable how people kept their distance and walked on the road to avoid passing people to close on the pavements. People seemed to be maintaining the 2 metre distance well. It is very strange feeling walking around.

April 2020 Thursday 2nd April Second round of clapping for carers tonight and I cried again as it was just as emotional. Friday 3rd April It's been two weeks since my daughter's last day at school. Our home schooling routine is going well and the school are setting plenty of work for us to keep my daughter occupied with - although me and my wife are not trained teachers so it is hard trying to teach a 4 year about doubling and halving! Saturday 4th April Keir Starmer is announced as Labour Leader (the Opposition leader). Hopefully he can start bringing the UK Government to account over its poor handling of the pandemic so far. Sunday 5th April The Queen made a speech on TV at 8pm addressing the nation. It was a very well written speech; whoever wrote it for the Queen will no doubt get credit in the future. References were included to World War 2 and included the line "we'll meet again" with loved ones, really seeming to catch the mood of the nation. Certain generations in this country will love the Queen for making the comparison with World War 2 and the Blitz spirit of the country. But goodness knows what's happening behind closed doors i.e. domestic abuse, families lived cooped up in small flats; children in poverty. People in poverty, although may be furloughed at the moment, may face unemployment once the Government's furlough scheme ends in October and employers can't afford to pay their wages. "We'll meet again" means very little to generations below mine. News has broken that the Prime Minister has been admitted to hospital with Covid-19 symptoms for routine tests. There's nothing routine about this pandemic, why try and play it down! I have little sympathy as last week he was photographed shaking hands with patients and staff in a hospital and he said people shouldn't be worried - what sort of message did that send and how many hospital admissions was he responsible for and ultimately, deaths? But I doubt there will be an open and transparent inquiry into his actions.

The Queen (or her speech writers/advisors) have shown more leadership in one well written speech than the Prime Minister has since China reported the spreading of Covid-19 in January! Keir Starmer gave a good first television interview today. Monday 6th April The Prime Minister is in intensive care (see my point above about routine tests and covid-19!) It is uncertain times, first Brexit and not this. Dominic Raab was asked during a TV conference when did he last speak to the Prime Minister and Saturday was his response. Saturday?! We are in a global pandemic and who is leading this nation's overall response? Raab said the Government are not thinking about an exit strategy; how the heck do we plan to deal with this pandemic then long term? Make it up as we go along? Sunday 12th April - Easter Sunday My daughter woke at 5am excited about Easter - it was a very long day! We couldn't have family over the house and we couldn't drive anywhere. It was very hot all day and the mix of a lot of chocolate and tiredness made my daughter very hyper and irritable. It was a hard, hard day parenting. Tuesday 14th April What day is it again? We've just celebrated Easter in our household. It was a very tough weekend not being able to see family or for my daughter to see her grandparents. Back to home schooling today, thank goodness. The lack of routine over the extended weekend has not helped with my daughter's behaviour. Work productivity was low today too. Four days off work spent in the house, what must it be like for retired or vulnerable people who are shielding? What must they be doing with their spare time? I took a rainbow picture to a mum from school who works in a nearby hospital and told me about her experience of working on the front line. The public are not being told the whole truth about how horrible this disease is and the majority of people on the intensive care unit are younger people. The Prime Minister is out of hospital and thanked the two nurses who stayed by his bedside - turns out one is from New Zealand and the other is from Portugal (oh the irony!) Still, won't change is view on Brexit so what was the point in helping him? I'm beginning to experience increased feelings of anxiety as the days pass and I think about how we are going to exit this horrible period in life and lockdown. Also, how can we make sure we don't experience a second wave in the autumn and winter as it is clear the UK Government has got the management of this disease wrong. They were too slow going into lockdown. We looked on a Ireland in disbelief when it announced it was closing schools, shops, pubs etc for a minimum of 6 weeks and we carried on as normal i.e. see diary entry on attending the two concerts! Germany have flattened their curve through stricter,

quicker lockdown and the roll out of community track and trace; it was abandoned in this country because of capacity issues! But it seems the private sector can test people i.e. Idris Elba has announced he has it (so how did he manage to get a test so quickly?) We clap for the NHS and the Prime Minister owes his life but the private sector get the testing kits first? Scandalous, what has the country become? The media is happy to report community/Blitz spirt but underneath capitalism is working to the fore and people are making a lot of money during this pandemic at other's expense. Surely this isn't right? Independence from the corrupt UK Government is starting to seem an attractive proposition now. Wednesday 15th April Work productivity low today. I put it down to anxiety levels and negative thoughts/ emotions. Working in a box room is not helping, too memories of working on my own in my room as a 16 - 18 year locked away from the world and also my mind wondering back to the past. Somethings I thought about I haven't thought about for years and wouldn't have thought about them during normal circumstances. This is really affecting me. I need to think positively and crack on with my work. Read this quote from a friend on social media earlier "I'm not working from home, I'm at home working during a global pandemic". Week 4 of lockdown is tough mentally and it will get tougher no doubt. I need to keep strong, positive thoughts. Breathe. Thursday 16th April I have anxiety and churning in my stomach. I really need this to end and get back to normal so I can forget thoughts I'm having and re-living the past. Lockdown has been extended for at least another 3 weeks. I think it will go on a lot longer. A doctor from the nearby hospital told my wife that we're 3 weeks from the peak. Hopefully by May (may be by the time of my daughter's 5th birthday on 19th May) restrictions will be lifted a little. Clap4Carers felt a little flatter tonight, perhaps everyone is fatigued or realised this is going to last a few more months? Not a good time. Friday 17th April Recognising anxiety is one step. Overall, I had a positive day. Productivity up work wise. My daughter is in good spirits too which helps. Monday 20th April

Mixture of emotions today. I'm trying so hard to remain positive but I'm longing for a return to normality and I'm finding it overwhelming now. I knew isolating fatigue would take over; just have to get through it. Listened to a video message by of the senior members of my organisation today. I weld up and tears came to my eyes. Don't know why but having lots of different emotions and thoughts. It feels like mental torture at the moment and can't really express it verbally to my wife. Back to home schooling routine today thankfully. My daughter seems off sorts and missing friends now. I'm hoping her maths skill will improve by the time she goes back to school as it's a struggle at the moment! Thursday 23rd April Clap4Carers tonight - being looking forward to 8pm all day. Half-way point in lockdown (I hope) and not as many people out clapping tonight. Perhaps we've reached a lull or fatigue? I hope this doesn't mean people will start going out more? Life is certainly different and the 'norm' seems very far away. The slower pace of life is good on one hand but mind numbingly mundane on the other. I know we're saving lives by staying home but I’ve had enough now. Real life can start again please. It is a mentally tough experience, no doubt there's going to be an increase in suicides and domestic abuse. The Prime Minister still not back in charge; Keir Starmer did his first Prime Minister's Questions yesterday against Dominic Raab, First Secretary who stood in for the Prime Minister. It took place in a largely empty House of Commons and questions were submitted by video links. Yesterday the Health Minister in Wales took part in a virtual scrutiny committee meeting by Senedd Cymru. The Minister left his microphone on as he complained about another member of his party's questioning of him about the Government's response to Personal Protective Equipment. He was overheard saying "What the f**k is she playing at". Perhaps the pressure is getting to him too like us all? Sunday 26th April My anxiety returned today raised by the amount of homework my daughter has been set. Fair enough if me and my wife were trained teachers but we are not! I'm still working full time; a full time parent; a full husband and now a part-time teacher! With everything else going on the expectation on parents is crazy. The school are saying the right things about parents not stressing or worrying but the home work is a lot! Monday 27th April Prime Minister is back at work. He made a fluffy speech about being at war against the virus etc. There may be potential to ease lockdown restrictions in England but not yet as he doesn't want to create a second wave (we're not even over the first wave yet!) The Police stopped two people going up Pen-y-Fan from Bristol and London - so not fair! Not everyone is adhering to the rules, people who don't comply with the rules in my opinion should be fined, heavily! New Zealand is reporting that its community cases of Covid-19 are zero - why can't we be like New Zealand?

Thursday 30th April The Prime Minister's first TV appearance at daily Covid-19 briefing since returning to work [was he missed?] Apparently we've passed the peak of hospital deaths - 8th April was the peak apparently. Although it is reported in the media that deaths in care homes is "rampant". The Prime Minister announced a five part plan for exiting which applies to England. The Welsh Government has a 7 point plan. It's the same disease, so it's all a bit confusing?

May 2020 Friday 1st May My brother popped over my house for lunch today. He sat in a tent in the garden, two metres away from us. It was really nice to see him and chat together. The "new normal" now seems normal and the initial panic and shock/uncertainty has abated. I think when lockdown restrictions do finally get lifted it will be a shock to the system. There could be wide spread fear when returning to normal as people now know the seriousness of the virus. Saturday 2nd May Last night I sent a message to Joe Wicks via social media has he has been admitted to hospital and seemed at a low ebb in his hospital bed. My message recommended he read books by Adam Kay and I gave him the following quote from the book "Ask how NHS staff are doing or how their day has been". I also told him how his daily PE sessions were helping me with my anxiety. I woke up this morning I found a private voice message waiting in my inbox from Joe Wicks replying to me which I was shocked at! Sunday 3rd May I felt low today, especially when trying to find the energy to play with my daughter. I did feel a little better when I went for a walk and bumped into friends and their children who are in the same class as my daughter. The encounter reminded me of life pre-lockdown and how in years to come we'll look back at this period and think how it changed our behaviour and the world's (maybe). Wednesday 6th May The first birthday in the family since lockdown began- we celebrated my mother's 66th birthday via a video call which seemed to cheer her up and she text me after it saying she'd enjoy it. The Prime Minister announced a statement will be made on Sunday about the partial lifting of lockdown starting as early as Monday. There were reports in the media of increased traffic on the roads today. I think as soon as people hear of the partial lifting of lockdown restrictions it will mean a return to normal. I predict the rate of infection "the R rate" will go up above 1 i.e. for everyone 1 person another 3 people will get it and the virus starts spreading out of control throughout the community. If this happens, we're definitely in for a second wave during autumn and winter as people spend more time indoors with one another and further lockdown restriction s. The increased pressure on the NHS during the winter because of Covid and winter flu could put huge strain

on it and push it to breaking point. Although if less people are going out and self-isolating/shielding then perhaps less flu will get passed around? Track and trace to stop the spread of Covid needs to be improved and a vaccine found before life returns to normality. It's important to note that the President of USA stated in a press conference last week that people should consider drinking / injecting disinfectant into their veins/lungs and us UV light to kill the virus. THE PRESIDENT OF THE MOST POWERFUL COUNTRY IN THE WORLD SAID THIS!! For the record, my daily routine (which I don't do on weekend): 6:15am: Up and breakfast 6:45am: Start work 9am PE with Joe 10am - 1:30pm: Work 1:30pm - 2:30pm: Lunch 2:30pm - 3:30pm: Home schooling with my daughter 3:30pm - 4:30pm: Play time with my daughter 4:30pm - 5:45pm: Prepare and eat dinner 5:45pm - 7:00pm: Work 7:00 - 7:30pm: Read to my daughter 7:30pm - 8:00pm: Bedtime routine with my daughter i.e. brush teeth and sing her to sleep 8:00pm - 9:30pm: Chill 9:30pm - 10pm: Read and bed Anxiety OK today, not great yesterday. Our team meeting was flat, I barely said a word. I sensed others felt the same. The novelty has worn off and I we seem all fed up. Other Teams are having virtual tea breaks/quiz/lunches but none of us in my team are in the mood and have not suggested any alternatives for us. The message from the top of the organisation is we may all have to work from home for a few months by the sound of it. 7th May is the next lockdown review, I wonder what will be announced? How do we return to normal is anyone's guess? Various countries around Europe are gradually lifting lockdown restrictions and easing social distancing. Britain is on course for the highest deaths rate from Covid-19 in Europe. Is it because like Britain had the worst initial response or just because it has the largest combined population? You can see the spin by the UK Government already! Return of anxiety today. Working from home in a small box room is frankly awful, too much time to think about the past, "what ifs", and to lose concentration.

Working full time and being a parent certainly helps stop thinking negative thoughts creep in. I cannot wait to get back to the office environment to be honest to save my mental health. Anxiety did lift whilst playing with my daughter, she certainly lifts my mood and helps me forget about the ongoing situation. How the heck is my daughter going to get back into a routine of school I don't know. My mood lifted when my mother popped over with an Easter egg for my daughter and passed it through the window. She didn't come into the house but was nice to see her in person through the window instead of on a computer screen. It was also nice to talk in person. My dad also read to a bedtime story to my daughter via video call on the computer. I hope it lifted their spirts as we haven't seen my dad and wife in person since February. Whilst completing PE with Joe this morning (I still haven't missed a daily session) I banged my little toe really bad on the bottom of the sofa. It's a nice shade of purple tonight. The Prime Minister's baby son was born yesterday - is there anything he won't do to try and get a bounce in the polls? We live in strange, strange times, ever since the EU Referendum result in 2016. Friday 8th May Bank Holiday today to celebrate 75 years since VE Day (but I don't see why we can't postpone it as no one seems in the mood to celebrate!) Watching the news and it seems lots of people had street parties with a distinct lack of social distancing going on and there were people filmed doing the conga! The Prime Minister and newspapers have messed up with unclear messages and reporting lockdown will ease on Monday so people are letting their hair down and thinking the end is coming. There will be a huge risk of an increased spread of the virus in 10-14 days - watch this space. Our street had a socially distanced street party. We sat out the front garden and chatted with neighbours and drank prosecco which was nice. It seemed to raise spirts and we met neighbours who we had never spoken to before. The First Minister in Wales has eased the lockdown in Wales slightly. From Monday people can attend garden centres, libraries, recycling centres. Also, people can now exercise twice a day. Before it was only 1 hour a day. The UK Government is bound to follow suit, although it will look odd the UK Government announcing changes following Scotland and Wales announcements! Saturday 9th May Lots of pictures in media of packed street parties and police reports of parks being full with people sunbathing, picnicking, drinking and gathering in groups. The UK Government message hasn't got through and lockdown fatigue has set in. The media reports also that 14 days quarantine for flights could be brought in! Much too late for this. This should have happened in March!

In early March, a friend came back from South Africa. When he flew into Gatwick there was no temperature checks or information given out. When he landed in South Africa they took his temperature and if he had had a temperature he would have gone into quarantine. Another friend went skiing in Northern Italy in February. When he landed in Bristol there was no information or warnings about high cases of Covid in Northern Italy i.e. where the ski resorts are. I watched a video comparing New Zealand and UK Government's approaches - lots of differences in the handling of the virus. New Zealand didn't want to risk any deaths, the UK's Prime Minister stated publicly in March that unfortunately not everyone will make it and prepare for people dying. How come the general public in the UK are OK with this? The lack of PPE is scandalous. It was reported this week that the Welsh Government had placed an order for PPE but only for it to be gazumped by the UK Government (which was always going to happen as they have more spending power and also this is post-Brexit so this behaviour seems to be acceptable.) Sunday 10th May UK Prime Minister gives an update and partial lifting of lockdown in England will happen. This won't apply to Wales as health is a devolved matter. Although the quarantine of passengers will apply to Wales because border control is not devolved. I wonder how quarantine will be enforced? It seems all it will be is a simple taking of details and that's it, no follow up checks or checking into a nearby hotel to be quarantined securely. There's been a massive backlash to how unclear the message of the Prime Minister was. At the start of lockdown the message was “Stay home. Protect the NHS." Now the message is "Stay alert". What the heck does that mean? Stay alert to what? So many questions and uncertainties which could lead to a second wave occurring as the general public won't have a clue. Luckily the messages don't apply to Wales, Scotland or Northern Ireland so hopefully those administrations can keep the rate of infections (R rate) down. Friday 15th May The Rate of Infection in England is now between 0.7 - 1. The next week will be crucial as to whether the VE bank holiday had an impact or not. The Welsh Government will review its restrictions in two weeks’ time. UK Government is considering re-opening schools in England in June - how that will work in practice goodness knows! Tough week home-schooling - I’m not a teacher and trying to teach doubles and halves to a 4 year old was beyond me. I think it sunk in but not 100% sure it did! My daughter seemed to get odds and evens, every cloud! Saturday 16th May No exercise today. I've done 13 days straight and feel very positive with no anxiety. It proves it does work, just have to keep at it, make an effort and get in a routine so it becomes "part of the daily routine of daily life". I thank Johnny Marr for inspiring me. Tuesday 19th May It's my daughter's 5th birthday today. Another first for lockdown. I took a day off work to celebrate with her. It felt like Christmas day as myself, my wife and my daughter were off work and school today. All the

grandparents popped around separately too and sat outside or came to the window. It's my dad's birthday too so it was nice to see him in person too as usually I get to see him if I was in work. We tried out very best to make it a special day for our daughter. We probably went overboard on the presents, and did lots of party games. I am knackered! Some of her friends from her class in school popped over with cards and presents which made my daughter very happy. Her class mates also sent video messages via the class WhatsApp group. It was a one of the better days in lockdown. I feel very positive and could be due to the amount of exercise I'm doing? I occasionally start thinking about how long this lockdown and Covid will go on for and then I have to stop myself and return to taking it a day at a time. Looking back at the UK Government advice for Covid in March i.e. children can't get it, under 40 year olds aren't affected by it etc was totally wrong. I think lockdown in Wales will ease a week Friday before the next Bank Holiday but it will be gradual easing. We are resigned to the fact my daughter may not be going back to school until September. Friday 22nd May News has broken very late in the day that the senior advisor to the Prime Minister Dominic Cummings has broken the Covid rules in England. More to come over the weekend no doubt. Saturday 23rd May It is confirmed that Dominic Cummings is alleged to have driven from London to Durham at the beginning of lockdown has he thought his wife had Covid symptom. The Prime Minister didn't appear at the daily television briefing - I wonder why?! Trying to get the lines right no doubt. Sunday 24th May Another allegation has been given that Dominic Cummings made another trip during his time in Durham to Barnard Castle, instead of self-isolating and not going out. The Prime Minister appeared at the daily television briefing but denied the allegations against Dominic Cummings. Monday 25th May Dominic Cummings did a press conference in the garden of Downing Street - he's a political advisor not a politician so why he is allowed to do a press conference there? What is happening? Dominic Cummings said he didn't have childcare in London if he caught the virus as well as his wife so he drove to Durham to self-isolate to be near family who could help. He used a vague paragraph in UK Government guidance to justify the trip. Everyone else in the UK has been told to follow the rules and not leave the house if someone in the household has symptoms and to self-isolate. My wife had Covid symptoms and I had to work from home and do the school run etc and I managed. I don't know what I would have done if I had developed the same symptoms, I would have had to managed- but I certainly know what I'd do now! One rule for the elite, another rule for the rest. It's typical of the way the UK Government is treating the general public - with no respect whatsoever and the general public can't see. It turns out his wife didn't have Covid. He said he took his son to hospital but did not have Covid either. Dominic Cummings admitted he left the house to take them to and from the hospital as no taxis available.

On the 15th day, so the day after quarantine, the family left the house and drove to Barnard Castle to test his eye sight, yeah, his eye sight!! If this is true, which I doubt it is, he risked the lives of his wife and child to test his eye sight" There has been no suggestion by any medical professionals that a symptom of Covid is a loss of eye sight. He thinks he's above everyone else and it's made me very angry. Also, he's broken the Highway Code and the law for dangerous driving! The trip to Barnard Castle was a 60 mile round trip, that's a heck of an eye sight test!! This is unbelievable treatment of the general public. Dominic Cummings didn't apologise either, the nerve of the man. The Prime Minister won't retract his statement because he a still maintains the allegations were false! This just doesn't make sense, it's like an episode from a political sit com. This will majorly affect the UK Government's messaging around lockdown and their general popularity. Tuesday 26th May Approval rating for the UK Government has been published and are down - the birth of a baby hasn't saved the Prime Minister! Another UK Government Minister has admitted today that he too has driven to test his eye sight, unbelievable lies and attitudes towards the media and general public. There's still people dying in hospital from Covid-19 and there's no sing of track and trace system coming on line. In Wales, lockdown messaging is still "Stay at home". There seems to be general approval for this in public opinion. Lockdown is due to be relaxed on Friday, but by how much? This week is half-term but to keep some sort of normality and routine, which helps my daughter's behaviour and keeps us sane, we're still doing home-schooling. Also, in Dominic Cumming's statement he said he predicted the impact of a virus in a blog. However, it turns out the blog was updated and edited in April 2020 - another lie. Thursday 28th May Tonight I took part in the last Clap for Carers/NHS. Over the last few weeks on a Thursday a harpist has played in our street from 7:30pm - 7:55pm before the clap at 8pm. This wouldn't have happened without the lockdown and the community spirt which has developed as a result of it. I suppose that's one positive to come out of all the negativity. It was emotional thinking about the first Clap for Carers and how this was the last time the street would do it together on a Thursday at 8pm. It feels like an end of a chapter in the Covid/lockdown story and the further easing back to normal life. Sunday 31st May I went for my weekly Sunday morning jog - I did 4.5 miles today. I felt great afterwards and positive. It's 9:45pm as I write this and I have developed a feeling of anxiety. Lockdown is due to ease tomorrow in Wales. Some family and friends seem to think we're getting back to normal and are going round each other's houses for BBQs and children are mixing/playing together in the street. They don't realise daily cases of Covid are almost 8000 a day and the daily death rate is in triple

figures unlike elsewhere in Europe. It seems politics and the economy are taking priority over the science. Will there be a second spike? Part of me wants a second spike to prove Prime Minister's policy of opening up the economy too soon was wrong. I wonder how many 'leave' voters are ignoring the lockdown restrictions compared to people who voted remain? I feel a little teary tonight, normality seems far away. How much do I need my old life back to rid some of the thoughts I'm having and to help me move my life on. More reports in the media that it was actually Dominic Cumming's wife's birthday on the day they went to Barnard Castle.

June 2020 Thursday 4th June The Education Minister for the Welsh Government has announced all schools to re-open on 29th June for 3 weeks. She stressed it won't be a return to normal nor a return to normal in September. Very little guidance was provided during the announcement on how schools will maintain social distancing, especially for younger children. All we know is school start and end times will be staggered for different classes to reduce the amount of children and parents on site at any one time. Classes will be at maximum 30% capacity. My daughter's class is 30 pupils in total which means there will be a maximum of 10 pupils in a one time. But how will 5 year olds be kept 2 metres apart is beyond me. There won't be a return to full days either i.e. 8:55am - 3:30pm some parents don't realise this. I.e. the reaction of some of the parents on the WhatsApp group for my daughters' class was shocking. One said "Thank f**k for that, I’m glad they're going back. They're doing my head in!" I don't think she realises it won't going back to normal for a while yet! My wife and I made the decision not to send my daughter back to school until September. The Education Minister for the Welsh Governments admitted the re-opening of schools on 29th June for 3 weeks is to test the safety measures and running of the schools so changes can be made ready for September. The daily death rates from Covid is still over 300 per day and the rate of infection is still between 0.7 - 0.9. We don't think it's safe to send our child back to school until September due to the lack of clarity and guidance from the school/politicians. We do accept our daughter needs social interaction with her friends/other children has she has become very clingy to us and we are concerned how she adapt to being around children again. Her behaviour is up and down and we recognise this is because she probably needs the company of other children. It is a tough decision to balance her health and safety against her overall well-being and need for her to develop her social skills. We're very glad we only have one child, other parents we know have two or three! I don't know how they've coped. We're nervous and anxious over the re-start of school and we're relying heavily on the school and local authority to provide us with the relevant guidance. We wait and see. Tuesday 9th June New Zealand officially declared free from Covid with no report cases. The country is re-opening its economy from taking an early, strict lockdown approach. I look on in envy. New Zealand's Prime Minister

has shown great leadership, strategic vision, seems genuine and personable. The totally opposite to the current Prime Minister for the UK. Luckily, health is devolved to the Welsh Government but it has followed the lead of England and Scotland. Why not follow the lead of New Zealand? Perhaps the case for independence will now become clearer? Why just do what England does? Nearly 300 Covid related deaths recorded today. There was a mass demonstration over the weekend across the country in response to the death of a black man, George Floyd in Minnesota in the USA. He was murdered by a policeman. I wonder whether the mass protests will result in another spike in Covid cases in 14 days’ time? Friday 12th June The rate of infection in Wales is now 0.7, the lowest in the UK. Slowly and steadily things are returning to some 'new' normality. Social distancing i.e. keeping 2 metres away, no handshakes, hugs, queuing to get in shops, wearing masks and visors in shops is the new normal. Everyone seems to be accepting this now. It was announced today that the UK economy shrank by 25% in April, the worst on record and we're officially in a recession. I predict it's going to be a grim few years ahead and Brexit is back in the news today as negotiations re-commence. God help us - what has happened to this country? Friday 19th June The First Minister of Wales has relaxed lockdown rules for Wales. Non-essential shops are to re-open on Monday 21st June and a 5 miles stay local rule is to remain until 6th July. Caravan sites can start to take bookings from 13th July and barbers and hair dressers can reopen from that date too. Slowly we appear to be putting the worst behind us and it does feel the world is starting to move into a different place. My wife is now working every afternoon, Monday - Thursday to re-build her business which means I have to home school my daughter on my own in the afternoon and then prepare and make dinner, and then oversee dinner time with my daughter which is always a challenge each night. At least my wife is getting a break from the house, me and my daughter 4 afternoons a week! How I would love to get out of the house and walk into the office just for some space, peace and quiet, and different scenery. At the moment it feels like I am spending 24/7 with my wife and daughter which isn't doing much good for my relationships with either of them. It's been a struggle. We've heard of other couples struggling to cope with the pressure of living in each other's pockets and parenting. I wonder what the divorce/break-up rate will be like when lockdown restrictions come to end? The local council has announced schools in the county borough will break-up on 17th July, not 24th July as announced by the Education Minister. Our school has announced children at the school will go back to for 1 day a week and will be in a bubble with 8 other children. This still isn't enough to convince my wife that it is safe for our daughter to go to school for one day a week. Oh how I could do with 6 hours to myself in the house working in silence! Ah well, roll on September when my daughter will return to school full time (hopefully!) It's going to be a long 2 and 1/2 months until my lockdown has well and truly ended but got to remain focused and positive on a return to school in September. Who knows I may be able to return to the office a couple of days a week by then as my organisation has announced a limited trial of re-opening my office building. Things are starting to re-open again.

PE With Joe Wicks which has helped me a great deal over lockdown to stay positive, improve my mental health, and get into shape. I was determined to come out of lockdown fitter which I have achieved thanks to Joe Wicks' daily PE live sessions. Joe announced today that he will be scaling back his sessions for 5 times a week, Monday - Friday to Monday, Wednesday and Saturday. Today was the last Fancy Dress Friday PE With Joe Wicks which was emotional and a weird feeling. It feels like a safety blanket is slowly being removed. Since March and the beginning of lockdown life has passed quickly - where has the time gone? But it has been mentally tough. I watched live Premiership Football on TV tonight without any supporters in the stadium, another small step to returning to normality. Monday 29th June The UK Prime Minister has announced the end of lockdown for pubs and restaurants. This gives the green light to people to hit beaches in England. There were ugly scenes at Ogmore in Bridgend this evening of brawls and anti-social behaviour. I wonder if there'll be a spike in Covid-19 cases in 10 days time? The message from the UK Prime Minister seems to be get Britain moving again but people are still dying of Covid-19 and this seems to be ignored at not reported by the media anymore. We were told this evening that my wife's grandad who has dementia and is in a care home has contracted Covid-19. What I can't work out is why after almost 3 months after lockdown restrictions began he was able to contract it? How was the virus allowed to enter into the home? Surely all the necessary precautions i.e. PPE for staff, regular testing of staff to ensure none enter the home with symptoms or with the virus, hand sanitiser would be in place by now? It was announced today PE With Joe Wicks is ending completely on 22nd July. This is when my diary is likely to end as it does feel like the journey through lockdown is coming to end. My daughter's school is re-opening today, her bubble would have been Wednesday. Normality seems to be returning but shops and town centres are still undertaking social distancing measures. September can't come soon enough but I wonder what the infection rate for the virus will be like then?

July 2020 Thursday 2nd July My wife's grandad died this morning. As a 'Do Not Resuscitate' form had been signed, he was not able to be admitted into hospital or put on a ventilator. He wasn't alone when he died, he had a 24 hour nurse with him and my wife's cousin who is a carer was able to visit him in her PPE equipment. At least he wasn't on his own, others have died on a hospital ward with no family members present. Saturday 4th July

Today has been dubbed 'super Saturday' in England. Pubs and restaurants are re-opening in England and small weddings with maximum of 30 people can take place in doors with social distancing measures in place. The rate of infection in London is reportedly to be above 1 and Leicester has been placed in local lockdown since Thursday last week (2nd July). The virus is not under control but the re-opening of the economy in England is taking precedent of people's health. Let's see what the rate of infection is in two weeks' time (18th July). For the first time since March I visited a non-essential shop to buy a sleeping bag for my daughter. Except for the availability of hand sanitiser and social distancing measures, it wasn't a substantial different shopping experience. Monday 6th July The ending of the "stay local" message i.e. 5 miles rule in Wales. Life is slowly getting back to normal although we've some way to go yet. There were pictures and videos in the media of packed streets in SOHO London on Saturday night with no social distancing going on. Oh dear! With the stay local restrictions being lifted, life is starting to feel a bit in limbo. We're out of lockdown but not quite as we still can't go into family's houses. It's a new normal which none of us chose and which I don't like. I'm still stuck working from home. It's going to be hard accept non-working in the office full time. I really hope come September I can go into the office may one or two days a week. Otherwise it will drive me insane! I'm just about holding it together for my wife and trying to support her through her grief and loss over her grandad but also her anxiety over her business recovering. On top of this I have to home -school and parent a 5 year old. I don't feel I have someone who I can turn to for support at the moment as everyone has their own problems to deal with. I feel the weight of the household on my shoulders which I have to support. Everyday feels like Groundhog Day for me. The UK Prime Minister has caused more anger by blaming care home managers for the spread of Covid-19 in care homes because they didn't understand the UK Government guidance or the procedures. What is this country turning into? For the past 3 days in Wales there has been no reported deaths from Covid-19. Wednesday 8th July My anxiety has returned. The rest of the country seem to be back to normal, like it's moving on regardless. I on the other hand feel stuck in between in worlds: Lockdown world and post lockdown world. I'm struggling to remember what pre-lockdown life was like. My life has been scaled back and is pretty much groundhog day. I believe it'll be like this until after the summer school holidays. My lockdown won't end until schools are back in September. I can't wait to have time to myself away from my daughter and wife. I feel suffocated now but I've got to keep going. I keep telling myself others have it worse than me but even that's getting tiresome now and I think "what about me

though?" I know I’m bottling this up and I can't tell my wife because I know she's just lost her grandad to the virus. I have no one else except these pages of this diary. I do feel close to tears sometimes. In other news, a hospital in the UK Prime Minister's constituency has closed its A & E doors department due to an increase in Covid-19 patients. Also Melbourne in Australia has been put into lockdown for 6 weeks due to an increase in Covid-19 cases. Covid-19 in England hasn't gone away as much as the UK Government want people to believe. Wales has taken a different approach from the start of the pandemic from the UK Government, slow and steady and the amount of Covid cases is low and remains that way at the moment. Friday 10th July A further easing of lockdown restrictions announced in Wales today. Campsites, outdoor gyms (are there many of these about?), beer gardens, outdoor cafes, and tourist attractions can re-open. Life is slowly getting back to normal it feels. I've heard a lot of people talk about their 'lockdown projects' as if it's something to brag about. I'm quite envious and jealous. I had less time to normal hobbies /chores let along undertake a project or learn a new skill. In a way I feel cheated but at the time I knew there would be some people who were having more productive lockdowns than me i.e. younger couples without children! Bring on September I say, although Leicester is in a 6 week lockdown and Melbourne (where it's winter in Australia) has closed all its schools so I’m half expecting lockdown restrictions to be brought back in some parts of the country (including Wales) in the autumn/winter. At work I’ve been told I need to take leave but I want to wait until September/October. Perhaps I shou ldn't risk it and I should take my leave now just in case? Monday 13th July Today was the day of my wife's grandad's funeral. A covid-19 funeral carried out in the midst of a pandemic. There was no church service (even though he was a devote Christian), no singing aloud during the service at the crematorium. At the crematorium seats were grouped together in pairs, two metres apart from other pairs. Before and after the service there was little social distancing going on. There was quite a few people hugging one another who aren't in the same bubble/household. I overheard the conversation "I don't a f**k about Covid" even though a relative had died of it! Ooh the irony I thought. A number of other family members joined them. Either I'm over reacting or they still don't get it. Probably the latter. The Welsh Government announced today that face masks will be mandatory on public transport - I think it's a bit late to introduce it now. The medical advice is they make little difference. By wearing them will people stop social distancing and washing hands which could lead to the transmission of the virus again and a second wave in the Autumn/Winter? Tuesday 14th July

Face masks to be mandatory in England from 24th July whilst people are out shopping - why is this coming in now? What are the politicians not telling us? Horse and bottled comes to mind. The UK Government was too slow in reacting to the pandemic. The Welsh Government is relying on the science and doesn't support face masks in shops -yet! Leicester still in lockdown and Blackburn has brought in more lockdown restrictions today. Wednesday 15th July Patrick Vallance the Chief Scientific Advisor to the UK Government admitted today at a committee inquiry that lockdown should have happened earlier on 16th March before the Cheltenham Horse Racing Festival. Lockdown actually happened a week later. Areas of Europe are being put back into lockdown i.e. Spain. Friday 17th July The Prime Minister made a statement today saying we could return to normality by Christmas - is he having a laugh? More lies. He seems totally intent on pressing ahead regardless and re-opening the economy, 'health before wealth'. He also mentioned piloting sport events and indoor gigs with people in attendance. What the heck is the strategy now given we don't seem to be near getting a vaccine? Herd immunity?

Wednesday 22nd July I took part in the last PE With Joe Wicks today. It was very emotional and I feel like a safety blanket/life line has been removed. I haven't missed a live PE With Joe Wicks session since the beginning of lockdown. I realise it was going to end one day. I've just to keep going with what I’ve learnt from Joe over the past 18 weeks until September when life hopefully returns to nearly 'normal' when my daughter hopefully returns to school full time and me in the office for maybe two days a week. It will feel strange without Joe as part of my daily routine. I know it's been easing since he went down to 3 days a week but now nothing?! I need to keep going with half-hour exercise day as it really helps my mental health. It's going to be tough without a live exercise class to join in with and experience the community spirit. I can't believe it's been 18 weeks. It's been a blur and I only remember a few individual PE With Joe Wicks sessions, they've mostly rolled into one. At the start of the pandemic/lockdown I was still processing what was happening and dealing with things on a day-to-day basis. I feel slightly anxious thinking PE With Joe Wicks has ended but I need to keep going with the routine I've adopted and stay positive and motivated.

September 2020 Tuesday 8th September It's been a while since my last diary entry as life has slowly returned to some normality (albeit with the wearing of face masks in all shops now). We've been able to 'bubble' up with 4 other households and welcome relatives into our home. My daughter has started back in school full time which has made life

easier, although I'm still working from home full time and unable to work from the office until maybe the New Year. Today it was announced local lockdown restrictions would come into force in Caerphilly from tonight until may October due to a rise in an increase in Covid-19 cases. This means no people meeting in door and only leaving the county borough to go to work or caring responsibilities. Schools remain open and so do pubs/restaurants which means you can meet close family members indoors in pubs but not in your house!

Wednesday 16th September Local lockdown restrictions have been announced for Rhondda Cynon Taf. Both my parents live in that county borough and will be affected by the restrictions although my mother is a key worker so will be able to go to work and she provides childcares for us on a Monday and Tuesday. I intent to make full use of the caring loophole. I feel angry at those selfish people who booked holidays abroad and then proceeded to meet people outside of their bubbles indoors which increased the spread of the virus. The Health Minister for the Welsh Government gave a radio interview today and gave an example of someone who came back from a holiday in Ibiza with 3 friends who tested positive for Covid-19 and went to a house party and then went out in Cardiff on a night out. This obviously helped spread the virus. The Health Minister explained this information was gained from the track and trace system in place. At least that's in place ready for the second wave which seems to be only a matter of weeks away (what a shame it was abandoned during the first wave!) The Health Minister gave another example where an indoor birthday party was held where 60 people attended which increased the spread of the virus. Once again, the track and trace system gave this information. The track and trace system, along with an increase in testing, is being given as a reason for why there is an increase in Covid cases (although the number of positive cases is also increasing). The Health Minister asked everyone who is displaying Covid symptoms to get a test - however it seems the testing capacity is being pushed to its limit as a colleague in work had to arrange tests for his two children. The nearest test he could get was in Aberdeen Airport or Inverness in Scotland, he lives in Cardiff!

Tuesday 22nd September Today it was announced that the following local authorities would be put into local lockdown from tonight: Bridgend, Newport, Blaenau Gwent and Merthyr Tydfil. The UK Prime Minister has re-introduced lockdown restrictions in England which will last for 6 months - I am not surprised at this. Restrictions include closing pubs and restaurants at 10pm - not a complete shutdown then! 'Health before wealth!' The Prime Minister also asked people to start working from home again only weeks after telling people it was their duty to return to their offices! During August the UK Government ran a scheme called 'eat out to help out' where it people money off their meals when they eat out during the week - I don't think people realised that it was tax payers who were paying for the money off bills! INSERT SCREENSHOT HEADLINES.

Friday 25th September Cardiff, my county borough, will be put into local lockdown restrictions from 6pm on Sunday 27th September along with Swansea County Borough area and the town of Llanelli (the first town placed under local lockdown restrictions). Pubs and restaurants in all local locked down areas have been ordered to close at 10pm - is this because the virus doesn't come out until after 10pm?! The rate of infection, which was at 0.7, is now between 1.2 and 1.3. We went into the first lockdown when the rate of infection was above 1.3. So far schools have stayed open in local locked down areas - I pray this remains the case in Cardiff over the forthcoming months. Sunday 27th September We went into local lockdown at 6pm tonight which means no meeting up indoors with anyone from our extended household (i.e. bubbles) and we can't travel outside our county borough boundary. It feels strange and claustrophobic thinking we are unable to travel outside the boundary of the county borough for an undefined period of time without a "reasonable excuse" (testing eye sight anyone?) Fingers crossed we'll be out of local lockdown by the end of half-term at the end of October. The early signs of the local lockdown in Caerphilly has helped to reduce the spread of infection - fingers crossed there are tangible results in the weeks ahead which will hopefully be replicated in our area where local lockdown restrictions exist. That will mean, hopefully, a swift end to the local lockdown restrictions and we'll be able to travel to see our close family against. It feels like a partial return to lockdown conditions experienced in March/April as we're unable to travel to beaches/country parks etc beyond our county borough boundary but the shops, pubs and cafes remain open along with the schools which is a positive. Our county borough is quite big so we've plenty of shops and parks to choose from. It was announced today that the following 3 local authorities will be put into local lockdown from 5pm tomorrow: Neath Port Talbot, Torfaen and Vale of Glamorgan. We received a notification from the school late this evening to confirm there has been a positive test for Covid-19 in the school. Luckily, it doesn't affect my daughter's class (how long will it be before my daughter has to self-isolate because a fellow pupil in her class tests positive?) Monday 28th September Neath Port Talbot, Torfaen and Vale of Glamorgan went into lockdown today. That brought the total number of county boroughs in local lockdown to 11 and one town. Tuesday 29th September It was announced this evening the following 4 local authorities in North Wales will be placed into local lockdown on Thursday 1st October at 6pm: Conwy, Denbighshire, Flintshire, and Wrexham as a similar pattern of transmission of Covid-19 was being seen in the 4 areas compared with the other local authorities already in local lockdown.